The Billy Bunter training regime

[Mike Drake]

I was on the club run this Sunday, and turned off about 11am with a few others looking to get home a little earlier.

As we were near Thirsk, we decided to call at a cafe for a cuppa, the other rider (I will call him Billy Bunter for now, it will become obvious why shortly), decided to have his ‘training snack’………….. a Full English, which was 2 eggs, 2 sausages, bacon, beans, mushrooms, a tomato and fried bread.

We eventually left there, all four of us, and headed back along the lanes to Northallerton. The pace was a reasonable 16 to 17mph with all of us taking turns on the front, but at the sight of the slightest incline, Billy was off the back and this continued for the rest of the ride. On level ground he was ok, so long as we waited for him to catch up and then he ‘sat in’, we started getting comments like “I wish you wouldn’t wait for me” he was done in and just wanted to get to the pub slowly and under his own steam (you can probably guess who I am referring to now), and then the unheard of happened.

I had stopped for a leak, saying I would catch them up. On rounding the first bend, I came upon Billy wrestling with his RDCC top (that’s the old red, green, black and white ones), which had burst open under the extreme pressure, that his rotund tummy was exerting on his top. He needed to enlist the help of his partner in crime ‘Little ****’ to assist in this task and as you will see from the attached photo’s, this was no mean feat…………trying to get that top to stretch around that growing girth.

In summary, it’s an interesting and entertaining training regime, but I think I will give it a miss.

Despite all this serious training and his interesting physique, he can still pull it out of the bag on a 10, and will be a force to be reckoned with on the club 10. He is actually on record, as saying he will win it, if Steve Fullerton does not ride this year.

[old tester]

I THINK THERE IS MORE THAN ONE BILLY BUNTERS IN THE D.C.C.

[miffcoppi]

Re training regimes, Carpet Dave has the `Toyota Problem` Throttle keeps sticking on full and the brakes don`t work. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[old tester]

well got round the hell of the north today 105 miles with over 50 miles of headwind.Had a lovely full english in hawes.It was a bit snowy over grains a beck.Left at 9.30 with the vets and got home at 5.35 just beat darkness.Pleased to be home with a can of fosters in my hand.

[old tester]

went for the healthy option today jacket potato and a chocolate eclair in Thirsk.anyway got 79 miles half of them in the hills.good day had by all

[Mike Drake]

You have obviously taken heed of the training notes I added e.g. Steady rides and not too hard. I shall try and dig out some info on diet/healthy eating and we might get you down to a decent size so you stand half a chance of winning the club 10.

[old tester]

You have obviously taken heed of the training notes I added e.g. Steady rides and not too hard. I shall try and dig out some info on diet/healthy eating and we might get you down to a decent size so you stand half a chance of winning the club 10.

what about hydration? going for my gallon of beer tonight getting ready for a ride to Crawlyside on sunday if anybodys interested

[Mike Drake]

There is some real serious training going on there.........how many miles per week?

[Wilf]

So, how was the Crawleyside ride??

[freewheeler]

Well it was certainly drier than the Saturday ride , Mr Bunter indulged in his usual full English plus a pint of lager to wash it down very tempting it looked too! It must pay dividends because two of the less substantial riders were blown off the road coming over the Bollihope by the fierce cross wind,not so Mr Bunter who rode imperiously on.